Two years ago today I became a mother... I don't know that I have ever contemplated more then today how my becoming a mother meant that the life of a 38 year old women was forever changed... The woman that carried my son for 9 months. The women that gave him his beautiful brown eyes and long lashes... His thick head of dark hair. I know that I can never comprehend how God worked everything out for her Julio Cesar to become our William Thomas... And I guess the mystery is one of the best parts. In the midst of all of the joy I have felt today as I watched this little boy calling my name "Mama" and bring me pretend food to play with - Or the hug and kiss I received only 30 minutes ago as he was placed in his bed with the frog blanket and monkey I bought for him when he was but a picture to me... A dream. A child I lay awake at night worrying over, but had never held... In the midst of all of the days festivities I felt a sense of sadness for that woman. I am overwhelming thankful that Blake and I can sneak into his room every night and watch him sleep. That we are the ones that get to kiss his "boo-boos"... That I often know what he wants before he asks and that I get to reap the reward with his hugs and kisses of "thank you". It's strange, this sadness... Because I would not give him up for anything or anyone. Yet I wish she knew what she was missing.